Have realised I have become very lazy. Really really lazy. The girls have eaten maccas more times than I care to remember in the last few weeks. So have I. I do a meal plan, buy all the necessary ingredients and then don't make half the stuff on the plan.
The house is a pigsty. Granted this is my my mess wholly and solely. However I'm an adult. I can pick things up. Doing this does not make me the maid. It means I take pride in our home and want it to look respectable and presentable.
I LOVE to exercise. Love it. I have got lorna jane gear coming out my ears. I bought a Mish Bridges top today and if it works well, there's another sports clothing brand I can invest in! (just what my husband wants to hear!!) the workouts Mish is setting in the 12wbt are freaking FANTASTIC!! Love them. Love that they are challenging!
Yet it's my eating where I suffer. Lately I simply have not cared. I have noticed that since the agent left I haven't eaten cos I'm hungry. I've eaten to fill the hole left by him. and that's not very healthy at all.
I am at the stage where I don't exactly care about my children. Without going into that too much, yes I love them. Adore them. And yes I do actually care for them very well. My youngest is asleep on my shoulder as I type this.
It's more I'm worn out by them. Over them. Needing a break from them. A break for longer than a couple of hours. Yet I can't see me getting that any time soon due to Bub not taking a bottle.
And I've also realised I've had enough of living like this. Enough. Done. I'm expecting a gain on the scales tomorrow. And I'm ok with that. It will give me a pint from which I can move forward. Forward in the right direction.
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